Sunday, June 17, 2012

Niagra Falls...so did I

Nik Wallenda tightrope tiptoed across Niagra Falls. I didn't deliberately set out to span a wide body of water, and I didn't have the TV cameras on me. Unlike Nik, my confidence is as bad as my balance and I just knew once I was hovering above the water I'd be taking a dive.

My son and his family were on vacation and he said I could use their above ground pool. My daughter-in-law's twin sister lives next door, and she had the key to the ladder lock, but she was occupied, and rather than wait for her to finish an important phone call, I said, "Nevermind, I'll manage."

I pulled the picinic table over to the side of the pool and yanked a chair up to the table, and climbed up to the rail. I hiked my lard butt over and plopped in. Something about floating with a large rubber ducky made me relax. But I kept smelling an overpowering odor of chlorine. How did I know the ducky held a four inch chunk of solid chlorine? I shoved that duck to the other side of the pool and enjoyed my swim. Okay, float.

My daughter-in-law's young nephew came over and offered me the key. I smiled and said, "It's okay, I'm already in. Thank you."

I didn't think about getting out.  An hour later, I climbed up the ladder, threw my left leg on the railing and did the splits as my right thigh and inside of my upper arm hit the ladder when it shifted and slipped out from under me. I bobbed a time or two, looked around to see who saw, and when I saw no one, I tugged myself out. I yanked the table and chair back into place and pretended I was fine. The ladder is lopsided and the bottom is dislodged. My bones aren't broken and my unsightly bruises will eventually heal.



12 comments:

Sioux said...

OMG! That sounds as awful as the time that woman pulled a chair out from under you, causing you to tumble to the ground.

It also sounds like something I would do.

Gawky people ALWAYS have something to write about...

Bookie said...

Oh, I have done something similar and KNOW the hurt!

Susan said...

Oh Linda, that sounds like something I would do. That ladder shifting was very unfortunate.Wish I could have seen your face, though. Sorry to chuckle. Take care and be gentle with those boo boos. Susan

Chatty Crone said...

Oh my goodness I hope you will heal soon. sandie

Joanne said...

Hope all of you recovers, and soon. Now, I wouldn't have done that. Because I can't do that kind of shifting any more. Becoming decrepit may have advantages.

K9friend said...

The good news is that you aren't still a captive bobbing like a cork in the pool.

Just think how pruney your hands would be!

Pat
Critter Alley

Val said...

Thank goodness the beach does not have a locked ladder.

Lynn said...

I agree with Val or otherwise, you'd be in a heap of trouble... hope you're not too sore.

Lynn said...

I agree with Val or otherwise, you'd be in a heap of trouble... hope you're not too sore.

Tammy said...

I agree with Pat--at least you did finally manage to escape! Hope you heal fast from your relaxing experience.

DeanO said...

That's a funny story

Debora said...

Sounds like the ladder bottom is not the only bottom that was dislodged in your fiasco! Lucy Ricardo has nothing on you!