Woo-Hoo!

I am enthused, enthralled, exhausted this morning after three days at the Missouri Writer's Guild Conference, JUST WRITE! I was C. Hope Clark's assistant when she presented at workshops. If you don't know who I am talking about, check out Funds for Writers. Hope is the founder; she puts out three newsletters packed chock full of information, call outs, contests etc.

I pitched my woman's ficton, The Hot Mess Chronicles, to two literary agents. One of them (a big name in the industry) asked me to send her the first thirty pages. I had a tear in my eye!

The other agent, who was closer to my age, asked, "Why would I want to read that? I lived in that era, I certainly don't want to relive it."

Obviously, we were not a good match. That's the way it goes; you can't take those comments to heart.

I am very realistic and know that chances are slim that my novel will be picked up. It is set in the 1980's but they want contemporary ficiton. I am hopeful that there might be a baby boomer market for it one day. I am patient.

I attended a workshop, An Agent Reads Aloud from the Slush Pile. The slush pile (stack of queries on an agent's desk) is where most work ends up if it survives the trash can. Writers submitted the first two pages of their work, (I did not) and as the work was read aloud, she dissected it, commented frankly why she would or would not read on. Few works made it past a few sentences. It's a brutal industry. But,in a very professional and friendly manner she made us aware of glaring errors that many writers make.

"She scurried down the hall." MICE SCURRY.
"Her ears pricked up." Did you really ever see ears prick up!
"His voice came through the wall." REALLY, let's rephrase that.

And so it went as she slashed flowery words; too many descriptors slows the story.

I met lots of nice people, and hugged presenter and inspirational writer, Linda Apple. She and I are running neck and neck with Chicken Soup books. Our stories are in many of the same books.

Elaine Viets, was keynopte banquet speaker. She has a fun, twisted sense of humor; she had us laughing out loud. She is St. Louis's hometown sweetheart, a former columnist for the local newspaper. She was fired from the Post-Dispatch for insubordination. Everyone knows that her humorous columns were the main reason why most people bought the newspaper. She's laughing in their faces, living in Florida in a beach condo, writing books.

Some day ...