Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Go ahead, rub it in!

I suppose you each have your own ideas about the many uses of Vaseline and baby oil.

In the '60s girls tinted a bottle of baby oil with iodine and tanned with it! OH MY!

In the '70s I used Vaseline to coat my baby's bottom when he got a severe case of chicken pox.

In the '80's I made my elderly next door neighbor's jaw drop when he overheard me say to my then-husband, "Get the jar of Vaseline. Go slow at first and let the lubricant work for you. Quit shoving, it isn't working, you need to grease it first. Oh wait, I'll go in the house and get it." I returned to the garage and helped him grease a black hose and fit onto the radiator.

In the '90s I used an entire bottle of baby oil each week on my escort. I applied it generously, massaged every crevice and hard to reach place. After every application, I felt a real sense of accomplishment, pride in fact. People would ask me what was different. I'd smile knowingly, and say, "I'll never tell."

Only thing is, my kids told! They told everyone how I rubbed baby oil into my old, neglected by-its- former-owner, Ford Escort. It used to have a red shiny paint job, but the paint had oxidized. It looked like an old red wagon that had been left out in the elements for years...until I gave it a full body massage. Did it ever perk up. Yeah baby!

I'd pull up to school and teachers would comment on my new paint job. Neighbors would ask if I had a new car. The pretty sheen lasted about three days. After the third day, the pollen and dust was so thick it looked like a hairy car. But oh for a few days, baby oil did the trick.

So, any oddities of your own to add to my recollections?

 

14 comments:

Val said...

Well...my husband's dad used to make him and his brothers eat a bite of Vicks VapoRub for a sore throat. To get rid of one, of course. Not to give them one.

Mevely317 said...

Too funny, Linda!
When DH and I were 'just dating' I used to put baby oil in my bath water for soft skin.
Unfortunately, one day I forgot to 'warn' him. When he went to shower and his feet hit that wet, slippery surface ... whoopsey does it!

Sioux said...

It wasn't really an oddity... In my grandmother's house, everything was cooked with bacon grease.

And hey--you're officially retired now! Congratulations. Now you can keep an eye on Sasquatch 24/7. And you'd better. I hear there's another writer who's after him...

Merlesworld said...

I used vicks for a few odd things, its very good on cracked feet but not on everyone.
You are right vaseline was used a lot before WD40 became popular.
Merle............

Cathy C. Hall said...

Yep, the baby oil we slathered on, sitting on the beach! But one summer, a couple of our friends decided to ride bikes all the way from town to the beach and they didn't have any baby oil. So they used their moms' Wesson oil!

NOT a good idea.

Weekend-Windup said...

I have not used them. Let me give a try for it...

Bookie said...

Well written humor! I would never have thought of using things like this on car paint. What an idea! But I do use lots of Vasoline around the house, eps on my feet!

Daisy said...

I remember the baby oil used as tanning lotion except it never worked for me. All I ever did was burn, so I didn't do the baby oil thing more than a time or two. I can't think of any to add to your list. Funny post! :)

DUTA said...

Once I found out by accident that my face cleaning milk lotion is good for cleaning genuine leather. I gathered the leather bags and wallets in the house and gave them a clean and a shine. The lotion was not greasy.
During the last decade I switched to fabric accessories which are lighter and also washable, so I don't need the help of the face lotion anymore, but I told about it to a friend and she successfully cleaned with it the leather cover of a sofa.

Susan said...

Hi Linda.

Funny post. And it's hard to write humor! You do it well. One time I told a friend I'd bring brownies for dessert. I made a pan of them and left the pan in the oven after turning off the heat. Wouldn't you know, when my friend went to cut them at her house, after dinner, it was a solid mass of chocolate cement.

She was a gourmet cook and she got quite a laugh out of my faux pax. Her husband almost keeled over from laughing so hard.

So much for my homemade dessert that night. ha haha Made me chuckle to think of it. Susan

River said...

I used vaseline on my babies bottoms too, but from day one, completely covering the area covered by the nappy, at every single nappy change. None of them ever got a rash.
I used it as lip balm against gusty winter winds too.
Last night on TV we learned that many beauty products have a large % of vaseline in the ingredients.

Theresa Sanders said...

This might just fall under the Too Much Information category, Linda... if I weren't laughing so hard! You can certainly tell a story, but then, I already knew that :) Thanks for making my day.

Tammy said...

I use a product called "Superthrive" on my plants. Great stuff, but the cap is known for sticking...until I read on a gardening forum to rub Vaseline on the threads. Works so well, I'm going to try it on other stuck caps. Oh, and I'm still laughing about that oily, "hairy" car!!

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

I love baby oil! I learned the trick years ago of applying it while still wet in the shower. When you dry off, you're skin is soft and smooth, and not oily at all! And now you tell me it works on car paint jobs, too. Not feeling quite so special now. lol