Happy Mother's Day to my mama

Ten years ago my mom, Virginia, aka: Nana Ginny, Maw-Maw, went to Heaven. I miss her everyday, especially THIS day.

On Mother's Day 2007, we went camping because nature has a way of easing me over rough spots. 

I awoke at dawn, mounted my bike, and sped across the concrete dam at Lake Carlisle. I was trying to outrun my overwhelming sadness and blow the stench of guilt off me. 

I  looked to the sky, searched the lake, yearned for a sign. As a tear trickled,  I got a sudden whiff of Mom's signature vanilla fragrance, and then... she touched me.  

Mourning Mom

High atop the dam
I pedal hard, feeling low.

Boats below with billowed sails

ripple the lake.

I tag the wind and search the sky for you.

A tear springs hot; I bid it not to splash.

I do not want to rock a boat,

especially mine.

As I bike away from
anguished thoughts.

wind gusts snatch my sorrow,

storm clouds swallow silent sobs.

I pause and mouth a simple prayer,

“God, let her be okay.”

I whiff a burst of hope and promise

on the early morning breeze.

Gentle tug upon my hair

tingles down my spine.

Did I really breathe your scent
and feel your tender touch,

or was that the universe caressing me?