Monday, December 30, 2013

Snoozing on a sandwich

We do not exchange Christmas presents. We save for summer vacation. This year, we replaced our 25 year OLD bedroom set and bought lovely, solid wood furniture. We love it!

Our mattress is only 18 months old, and like the two before it, which also cost an arm and a leg, this one has already broken down on hubby's side. He is much bigger/heavier than I, but still it just doesn't seem right that after only a few months each of these mattresses collapsed. The pillow top bunched up, the firm inner spring...well it sprung, and the latest with memory foam (a quarter inch probably), has forgotten how to rebound.

The small print on the warranty states that for a $25 fee the company will come out and measure two inches from the top of the mattress. If it has sunken in THERE, it will be replaced, if it has sunken in where your torso lies, well that's natural wear and tear, and the mattress will not be replaced.

After we huffed and puffed about this truth in advertising scam, we decided to go mattress shopping. We bantered back and forth.

"$1,000 for a mattress?"
"What guarantee do we have this one won't collapse?"
"I think we need one with extra support."
"What about an air chamber mattress with our own number controllers?"
"We've camped on air mattresses. You already know what the outcome will be."
"I think we'll wait until January 6th when the mattresses go on sale for 30% off."
"I will shove a body pillow under my side of the mattress."

And so he did. Prior to the body pillow, it was like rolling into a canyon when I turned toward him. With the insertion of the body pillow, it was like climbing the Matterhorn.

When our kids came for Christmas they wanted to know whose gift was hidden under the mattress.

I was embarrassed. They wanted to take up a collection so "Dad could sleep in comfort."

Two more weeks of  sleeping like this with my bum knee, sprained ankle and achy shoulder wasn't going to be good for my personality. I decided to rectify the problem. I asked him to assist me as I shoved a layer of three quilts between the box spring and mattress. Then, when he was out and about, I went down to the basement and brought up a 4'x5' piece of thick plywood. I shoved that mattress to the floor, slid that slab of wood between the three quilts and foundation, on his side, then I tugged that mattress back on top.

My honey has no idea he is sleeping on a board sandwich. But he thinks I am a genius. "Those quilts have made a real difference. Maybe we can put off buying a new mattress."

Now, had I suggested my idea, you know what he would have said. 

15 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

I hope you echoed his proclamation and said, "Yes, I AM a genius."

Susan said...

ha ha ha That was a funny story, Linda. Good move on your part.

You know, we have had a Sealy Postropedic (Don't know how to spell that) for several years now and it's still in good shape. You should check them out. Very good quality. It was expensive but worth it for several years of use.

Hope your day today is great.

Also, thanks for being a faithful follower. Susan

Susan Sundwall said...

Sometimes we just have to keep mum about our great ideas, don't we? Good for you, Linda, for figuring it out! Happy, Blessed New Year.

Val said...

What a scathingly brilliant idea!

Connie said...

Sometimes you have to improvise! :D Good for you for figuring out a temporary solution.

Bookie said...

A mattress is a personal and important item. We have one that is a few years old and never been as good as the old worn out one!

Merlesworld said...

We have beds here that are two king singles that lock together and are made for different weights and body masses.
They work well and if one fails you only have to replace one not the whole thing.
Merle.............

Pat Wahler said...

You may need to start a mattress consulting business.

Pat
Critter Alley

River said...

So is it the mattress that has collapsed or the box spring under it? The box spring shouldn't collapse. But if your mattress is fine with a board under it, then I'd say the fault is in the box spring and you're entitled to a replacement or refund. Next bed you buy, check the weight recommendation to be sure it can support up to or over a total weight of more than you both weigh together. It's worth the extra cost for something that won't break down.

River said...

Merlesworld has a good idea, separate beds for differing body weights.

Southhamsdarling said...

Love that little story Linda. May I wish you and Bill a very happy, healthy,and fulfilled new year, filled with many blessings.

Cathy C. Hall said...

We broke down and bought a king-sized mattress (a month ago)after 30 some odd years and after we got it home, looked at each other and said (well, yelled, really)"WHY DIDN'T WE JUST SPEND THE MONEY AND DO THIS YEARS AGO???"

Sometimes, you've just got to spend the money, Linda. Though I do love your ingenuity! :-)

And P.S. Happy New Year and happy writing, friend! Your posts always make me smile and I'm so very grateful to have found you!

Anonymous said...

He is right-you are a genius! Happy New Year

Sioux Roslawski said...

Sasquatch lives in the woods. Perhaps there IS no bed that fits Bill's height...

Mevely317 said...

What a great idea!!! I'm just wondering how in the tarnation you wrestled that mattress and plywood with your bummy ankle, knee and shoulder all on the fritz?
Where there's a will ....
Am I right?

Take good care of yourself, please? I enjoy having you around! lol.