REMEMBERING

When I was teaching, I could make the drive to school in fifteen minutes. On this day twenty-five years ago, I stood before my television and watched the first plane hit one of the twin towers. Horrific accident, I thought. As I parked at school, the radio announcer reported the second hit. My heart fell. 

I rushed into the middle school building, (my PreK classroom was housed on the lower level) a few older students in the hall were panicking and shouting that the US was under attack. My efforts to calm them were futile. 

Rushing to my preschoolers, who were unaware of the situation, I made certain they were in good hands with my wonderful assistant Amy.

I felt compelled to do something. Grabbed my scissors and cut red, white and blue construction paper strips, (like we used to make holiday chains), headed to the main school, and without prior approval, I walked into each classroom, introduced myself and told the students that they could each have a strip of paper to write exactly what they were feeling. Stated I didn't want strong profanity, but wouldn't object to mild swearing, and I didn't care about spelling or grammar. 

"You must release your feelings. I am going to roll each strip into a loop and make a bulletin board size American Flag with your words on each strip. Please look for your words when you go into the lunch room, and please do not destroy YOUR display."

I rolled each strip into a loop and stapled them to the large bulletin board: alternated stripes of red and white loops and created a blue area for stars to make a 3-D American flag.

At lunch, students walked in instead of plowing through. They paused to find "their" words, expressions of fear, anger, and worry. They talked to one another. Typically, the lunchroom bulletin board displays in the inner city school were destroyed no sooner than they were decorated. This day the students were reserved and actually interacted respectfully. 

The Feelings Flag remained intact for more than a week, and then one by one the strips began disappearing as the students claimed their feelings. Our lives were forever changed that day. My story, The Feelings Flag, was published in 2016 in Chicken Soup for the Soul, The Spirit of America on page 26.

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Years later we were on a cruise, seated at a dining table with a man named Daniel and his wife Farzana. Daniel's kind expression spoke volumes. His impish smile and greeting were sincere. When he shared his life story, six other tablemates were mesmerized by his voice and story. Both still resonate. This is a tribute to Daniel V.

He worked at the airport Port Authority of New York, and he also was a New Jersey police officer. Now retired.

On 9/11/01, he rushed to the Twin Towers with his partner, and together they climbed many flights of stairs to rescue trapped individuals. His voice cracked as he recalled the details. "Number one rule, never leave your partner." He choked up. "I left my partner. I found an elderly woman on a stairwell and I carried her many flights out of the building before the collaspe. My partner did not make it. Overhwelmed with guilt, I stayed drunk for a year. Then I got sober. My grandmother told me, 'Daniel, think of it as you being someone's angel instead of abandoning your partner. You saved that woman's life.' "

My throat tightens on this day REMEMBERING, remembering, remembering...