I live in St. Louis, MO, but my heart and soul hang out at the beach. I am a multi-genre, award winning writer, and speaker. I am a seasoned pre-k teacher, on line writing instructor, wife, mother, Nana to twelve. Hopefully, something I say will make you smile, further your writing career, or inspire you to write from the heart, too.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
We're all adults here
I need to tell someone.
I couldn't believe my eyes when I clicked on the
computer this morning at 5:00 and read,
Dear Mr. O, Your order for sanitary lubricant has been shipped
I read and reread. I researched the product: non
toxic, edible, petrol lube that could also be used on dairy cows. What the heck? I was flustered and my mind was spinning all sorts
of possibilities. My imagination was running rampant and my pulse was keeping pace.
It was all I could do to wait for hubby to wake up.
Cheerful as ever, he walked into the study and said,
I looked him in the eye and said, "Is there
something you want to tell me? Or that I need to know?"
"I love you?"
"I'll throw the laundry in?"
"What did you order personal lubricant for?" My words came out thick as molasses.
He looked at me speechless and dumbfounded.
Hesitantly he said, "Umm, (never a good sign!)
for the meat slicer I bought at Sears yesterday. The drive gear, pivot points and
blade have to be lubricated before using it. The brochure said to use Vaseline,
but when I went to Wal-Mart and read the label, it said, This product is not to
be used orally."
I exhaled deeply and laughed out loud when he told me he'd asked the paharmacist if they carried edible Vaseline behind the counter. Let me just
say that my facial expression probably didn't compare to the pharmacist's.
guy just looked at him. When hubby explained the intended use, the guy referred
him to Amazon.