Wednesday, October 24, 2012

You'd better not write about this!

I awoke this morning at my usual time, 5:00 and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I saw something crawling across the floor. A dust bunny I told myself. Then I put my glasses on. ACKKK! Black, pencil-lead thin, an inch long, inching along, its antennae wiggling like a GPS device trying to get a handle on location.

I didn't scream. I placed a tissue on the floor and waited for that creepy crawler to climb aboard. I grabbed the tissue and ran to the front door, opened it and looked for the critter before I dumped it, but it was NOT THERE. Yikes, not climbing up my arm? I did the scaredy girl dance, then I turned on every light in the living room. To heck with my sleeping honey. I searched the floor, no sign of it. I had to know, so I grabbed a flashlight and opened the front door and stepped into the darkness. As I was scanning the door mat, the motion light illuminated me in my nightgown as traffic whizzed by. I ran in and slammed the door.

All the lights, and whiz bang action woke you-know-who. I heard him brushing his teeth. I went to the computer to Google a picture of the critter. Hubby walked in and sat down. He scooted his wheeled desk chair behind me and looked over my shoulder as I researched.
"What are you doing?"

"Looking for information on a creepy crawler that I found in the bathroom." I grabbed a pen and pad of paper and drew it for him. (Maybe I drew it a little bigger than an inch.)

"A thousand legger? Centepede?"

"No, the shape of a worm, belly crawler, inching, its back raising up and down, antennae going wild."

He shoved his chair back and shouted, "Oh! You're coloring your hair!"

This is the same guy who said yesterday as a gust of wind whipped my locks, " It's time to color your hair; did you know it's all white underneath?"

"Yes, I'm coloring my hair. Does that surprise you?"

He laughed, obviously embarrassed and said, "I thought the damned thing bit you. Now I see it's just a drop of hair color on the back of your neck."

I laughed all the way back to the bathroom. He walked away mumbling, "Maybe you're right, I do watch too much Sci-Fi. You'd better not write about this!"

If you happen to see you-know-who out and about, you didn't read it here.


Susan Sundwall said...

Oh, Linda. I can so relate. I have had many a creepy crawly adventure in our old house. LOL I've got a really cool version of the scaredy girl dance, too. Let me know and I'll send you the moves.

Susan said...

That was funny, Linda. Was it a centepede? Yikers.

Most of my creepy crawler screams came from the southwest. I could have become a professional "screamer"---taranchulas, scorpions, snakes, wolf spiders, cockroaches-----you get the idea.

But never fear, even New England spiders make me quiver and I've let out a few screeches here, too.

I'm sure the drivers going by your house got a chuckle out of the motion light early morning model!


Anonymous said...

Oh Linda I have them. Even in my new place they were there.

I had a long thin worm crawl along last night on the floor.

I did the same as you but then it rolled in a circle like a black bead.

In the bathroom I get those fast wee silver bugs.Swooch they are gone. Nor always maybe once a week.

The other place we lived we had ants to know end. To me that was worse.

So I will take the crawly bugs to having a rec room of huge black ants crawling everywhere.

You have Nature buggies loving you place Linda. Maybe they smelled your morning coffee.

Did you see that comercial where the lady opens the patio door at night and she says something like. Come on in Kitty, kitty. The raccoon walks in . Now that would be an unwanted creature in my house. she was not even aware of it. Duh.

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Once again, you've made me laugh. I've done the scaredy girl dance many times! Did you ever find the bug?

Joanne Noragon said...

I was waiting to hear the door clicked shut. With the lock button pushed in. You were out alone, in your night gown, with only a flash light between you and the traffic....

Oh, wait, there was a happy ending.

Southhamsdarling said...

This post did make me smile, Linda. Oh my goodness, I hate creepy crawlies of any description, and I would have been doing that scaredy cat dance right along with you!!

Val said...

Please. Let us know if you find that thing. I feel all unsettled to think of it roaming your house. Slithering up the bedspread. Laying next to you on your pillow. Oh. The fumes from your hair-coloring chemicals will keep it away for a night or two.

Sioux Roslawski said...

Did you tell Bill that HIS hair is white (gray) underneath AND overneath?

Aah, yes...the fun of hair dye. It looks like I sponge-painted my bathroom walls, but the color isn't Benjamin Moore--it's L'Oreal instead.

Anonymous said...


Lynn said...

Geez, at first I thought the thing was crawling on your neck!