Sunday, December 4, 2016

A gamut of emotions

My heart is broken. Hasn't been the first time and it won't be the last. It never gets any easier to lose a beloved pet. Kitty No-No, whose name was actually Tweeny, (named by the original owner's kids when he was adopted at age one by my son and his family from the Humane Society) crossed the rainbow bridge on Saturday.

He had been panting the past few days. We thought he was having nightmares. When he snoozed, his chest rose and fell heavily as though overexerted from playing or running. It became apparent even when he was awake, but he was never in distress. We took him to the neighborhood walk-in veterinarian, an older man, who has no diagnostic equipment in his little store-front office. He sent us immediately to the emergency hospital. 

Tweeny was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. Ultra sound revealed only a small portion of his heart was functioning, and the left chamber was flacid and flapping, not filling. He never once complained, or seemed in pain. In fact he ate more and was more cuddly than ever. The doctor removed a lot of fluid from his lungs, but she said although he was no longer at risk for imminent death, his lungs would steadily refill. So we did what we had to do. We sent our 10 year old best buddy over the Rainbow Bridge.
 He lived with my son's family for six years, then when they moved away, we took him. He was our sweet boy for three years. Such a docile and sweet kitty, he loved "hiding" in a paper bag.
 He enjoyed watching his favorite show, the fish aquarium on Net-Flix. He always looked toward the floor when one of the fish swam downward and disappeared from view.

Last year, the Hershey Kisses holiday commercial, where the kisses ring We Wish You A Merry Christmas like hand bells, always got his attention. He'd come running, sit in front of the TV and watch it, turning his head this way and that. This year when he heard it, something in his memory triggered. He looked at me quizzically. He wasn't the brightest, but he was sure the sweetest and cuddliest.
He had a "relationship" with a chipmunk who scampers in front of our door and runs in and out of the bushes. Kitty would talk to the birds on the lawn, and he liked to look out the front door at passersby.

What he really liked was when Liam came through the door each Monday. At first he was jealous of him, and avoided him when he was little. Lately, he ran TO him instead of away from him, because he knew Liam would feed him his treats. At nap time, they would both curl up on the bed. I dread having to tell his little buddy tomorrow.

I'm going to miss him sleeping at my feet, meowing for his breakfast, and following us around the house. He had to be in the same room with us. And his favorite place to snooze was between Bill's legs in his recliner with the foot rest raised.

Tweeny was loved so much. He will be missed, and I know the ache will eventually ease, but right now, our eyes are red and our emotions are raw.

Blog friend Claudia is still hospitalized trying to recover from surgery, and will be there a while. That is all anyone knows right now. I appreciate your prayers and concern for her well being. Cancer took another friend and fellow writer, Mary Hughes, last week, and a high school buddy was recently diagnosed with cancer.

On a happy note, my doctor walked in the exam room and said, "You sure look good on paper!"

Of course it would have been better to hear her say, "Wow! For an old broad you look great." But I knew she was talking about physical exam results. Haven't shrunk at all, and am maintaining my blood pressure, cholesterol, and weight. I told her I'd prefer to lose 20 pounds. She said, "But for your age, your BMI is within the norm, so you're okay." My lab results all improved, and I am not on any prescription medications.

She asked if I regularly exercise. I told her about 3-4 times a week I walk briskly up and down the aisles at either Wal-Mart, Sam's or Costco. She nodded, and then this evil little grin crossed her face and she said, "But do you stop at every little freebie booth for a handout?" I smiled and lied, "No, my husband does." She laughed.

I have a lot to be thankful for, especially your readership and kind words. Winter is about to nip at  my nose and toes here in St. Louis. Stay warm if it's cold where you are.


Julia Gordon-Bramer said...

Oh Linda, I'm so very sorry about your kitty. We have lost a few cats due to age and disease. It is the hardest when it surprises us, when we think we've still got a long time with them. That's how it was with my Simon.

But my Simon still comes to visit us in our dreams. Energy does not die--science has proven that. Your kitty is around you and will continue to be, I promise. If you're like us, you may be wondering if you've got one reincarnated in a new cat too. I think they like to stay with us, and they'll return in new forms. <3

Sandi said...

Linda, my condolences.

"Tweeny was loved so much."

I don't have the right words, but that little sentence says it all.

Praying for your friend Claudia.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

So sad for you. There are no words that can comfort right now. Too raw.

Val said...

Oh, so sad to say goodbye to Kitty No-No. I love the picture of him looking for the fish.

Sioux Roslawski said...

Linda--I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is heartbreaking, but Kitty No-No was lucky. He had a great life with you and Bill...

DUTA said...

In a way, I think Julia's right. Kitty has died physically but his spirit is on in your house.

Susan said...

Ohhhhhh, that was a sad post, Linda. I truly share your sadness. It's been a few years since my beloved Honey Cat died and I still miss her with all my heart and soul. Oh, what I wouldn't give to see her come prancing into the room again. You had many good years with Tweeny, too, so you are blessed with sweet and funny memories. My condolences to all. I am so, so sorry. Hugs. Susan

Southhamsdarling said...

So sorry to hear of your loss, Linda. Tweeny sounded like such a sweet character. Sending hugs your way.

Connie said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Linda. We've gone through that sadness here too. It's never easy. I know your kitty was well loved and lived a happy life with you.

Karen Lange said...

So sorry to hear about your Kitty. It's never easy to lose a beloved pet. Hoping that Liam will make you smile and help your heart mend.

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Kitty No-no was a lucky cat to have found two loving homes in his lifetime, and you made his last years especially gentle ones, I would imagine. I'm so very sorry for your loss, Linda.

Pat Wahler said...

It's always tough to let a furry friend go. So sorry for your loss, Linda.