When my head hit the pillow

The world is in such a mess.
Still I have faith and hope that
tomorrow will bring brighter days;
calmer heads will prevail;
compassion and peace
will lead to positive changes. 

I can be an instrument of peace.
I can spread a little sunshine instead
of focusing on the gloom and doom
that seems to envelope us.

I can offer a helping hand,
speak with a softer voice... use 
inspiring words that offer comfort or
provoke a thought that leads to empathy.  

I can meet eye to eye, offer a smile, incite laughter
because we all need to turn our frown upside down a while.

Wednesday, near midnight, after an entire day of constant TV viewing, observing unbelievable, unspeakable behaviors, gut-wrenching, nerve-wracking real time scenes playing out on the screen as the US Capitol was taken over, I went to bed angry-red and broken-hearted blue from the pandemic statistics.

Sometimes when I have too much screen time, my left eye goes wonky and I see a bright wall of flashing white lights for a few minutes. If I cover my eye, it subsides shortly. I have been examined by two opthalmologists who say it is not a retina tear, just eye strain or ocular migranes. My head does not hurt.

With a heavy heart and sigh, I climbed into bed, thankful for the snorer and the creeper. My honey rumbles like a motor and the purr boy inches his way from the foot of the bed and scrunches himself right NEXT to my legs or any curve he can find.

When my head hit the pillow, my eye started flashing bright white. I laid still and prayed 

for my family whom I miss so much, for peace, a friend's daughter battling cancer, and our back door neighbor who just lost her husband of 50 years. I covered my eyes with my palms. I breathed deeply. I opened my eyes and holy macaroni! I saw bright RED flashing lights.

Well this was a first. I squeezed my eyes shut. Opened wide. Those red lights were spinning back and forth, dancing left and right every where I looked. I played with them a little bit, open, close, flash-flash, gazed up, looked down. They were persistent.

Then I heard a thud, got up, looked out the window

at an ambulance in the next door neighbor's driveway.

Relieved for me and concerned for her, I added another person to my prayer list,
closed my eyes and went to sleep.  

If you can't laugh at yourself, laugh at ME. 

No, it wasn't the same, but different can be good

Christmas 2020 is in the history books. Such a different holiday for us. Bill and I visited each of our four adult children in their homes instead of everyone gathering in our small house. It really was very 

intimate and special this year.

Seeing the great grandsons was as much a delight as it was seeing our own kids and older grandkids who were home from college/work. We spent quality time with each family, missed two oldest grands, but we plan to throw a big bash this summer where we can all be together again, hopefully. Good-bye 2020!

We walked in the front door with a container of fluffy, plush snowballs and set the boys into action. They bombarded paw paw and had the best snowball fight with us. Their laughter is a happy memory.

Alex is quite the tinkerer at age three. He received two sets of tools and has been using them! He likes his goggles and work gloves. He has a car that has removable parts and he loves it!

Charlie is the typical active  two year old, vocalizing in full sentences now more than striking out and screaming. But as you can see he got very excited here when he realized what was about to happen...

Charlie saw Alex wearing his chef outfit, and mama on her way to make green pancakes for Christmas breakfast. Alex loves to help cook. 

Liam, age six, received SO many video games and battery operated cars and things to play with. However when I showed him what we could do with the empty box in which I carried the gifts, he was mesmerized. He has inherited his mom's artistic ability. He had fun with his remote control car that did flips and zoomed around, but he was as interested in what I was doing. He watched me turn the box upside down and lay out dry erase markers and eraser. He took the things into his room and began to draw on the plasticized cardboard which makes it a dry erase board. Charlie left the chaos of the livingroom to find Liam, and when he did, he sat right beside him and also drew. 

 Who says kids need expensive toys?! I used to present workshops for teachers: Learning Games from Trash to Treasure. Notice, the box is on a slant. When the child rests his arm on the box, it provides the stabilization needed to support the wrist/forearm. This discarded box provided much entertainment. 

I hope you had a good holiday and are prepared to beat the heck out of 2020 tomorrow night. When the boys' mama Ashley was three, she was spending the night with her great grandma. I called at midnight and told her to get a pot and big spoon and beat the heck out of the old year.

She handed my mom the phone and said, "Nana wants me to beat the heck out of an old deer with a pot and spoon."

We are on a countdown now. Blessings to you and yours.

But what can I DO?

I wake early. Make a cup of green tea and sit and sip my warm beverage by the light of the Christmas tree. I gaze at the meaningful, simple, and homemade ornaments, which are priceless to me. There are framed photos and scribble designs made by our children, grandchildren and great grandsons which span almost half a century. A tiny gauzy angel which belonged to Bill's late mom adorns a branch high on our tree. It is possibly a century old. I revel in the beauty of the lights. I can almost hear my first great grandson at age two shouting excitedly, "Balls, Nana, Balls!" Balls were his favoroite thing then, and when he saw the colors splayed like balls all over the livingroom, his joy became mine. To this day I can feel that joy in my heart.

 

I look back at Christmases past and wonder if times were better or just seem to have been. I cherish meories of Tracey's and Jason's childhoods. We had such fun sled riding, decorating, making cookies and sitting on Santa's lap and especially visiting family on Christmas Eve. I miss my mom more than ever.

I miss the close contact most of all, the hugging, smooching of little cheeks, and wide-eyed close talking as they share their innermost thoughts and excitement about their presents. 

When my daughter was five she unwrapped a little purse. She held it up, pointed to the dangling price tag, and shouted with glee, "Look! Santa shops at Target, too!" Oh the memories.

I love this little statue of Santa holding a candle. It reminds me of a long ago song: This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine. Let it shine. Let it shine... 

The message brings hope in times of despair and uncertainty. All is calm... all is bright. If ONLY. 

Peace begins with each of us. Random acts of kindness pile up like presents, and each of us gets to distribute our gifts. Let your light shine. Seek peace, calm, serenity and remember that Jesus IS the reason for the season. Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all of you.

 I had my annual well visit yesterday. My doctor asked how I was feeling. Tears brimmed when I told her I missed nine months with my great grandsons. She agreed isolation is the worst. And she asked how things are at home.

"Oh fine. Really! Bill makes me laugh, and I make him food. We're happy!"

She laughed out loud. I think she needed that. Her husband has a terminal illness. I told her I pray for her and him. It was good see the gratititude in her expression. These are the random acts of kindness that cost nothing and pay off big. 

From five cents to five bucks

Did you ever lose something and instead of feeling upset, it made you really happy? And then you lost a second one and it doubled your happiness?

It's pretty big stuff when you're six years old and you lose your first baby tooth. Liam was ecstatic when his right front tooth fell out at school last week. They sent it home in a little plastic container shaped like a tooth. 

The tooth fairy left him five bucks. If I recall, she left me five cents! But you know, inflation and all.  

Yesterday the second tooth fell out as he was riding the bus to school. Luckily he was wearing his mask. His mom came home after work, and he stood in front of her with his mouth closed. He kept staring at her.  Ashley said, "What's wrong?" Then he smiled.

All he wants for Christmas is his two front teeth. 

I remember when those teeth came in. He was almost a year old and still toothless. The teething toys didn't do a thing, so I bought a big fat carrot for him to gnaw on. When he tired of it, I dipped the tip in syrup so he would chew some more. After a few days, his first tooth erupted and then the second. 

We were so excited when those teeth came in, and now he's excited that they are coming out. 

Times they are a changing. I will be so happy when I can squeeze him and his brothers again.

Sunday night at 8:00 p.m. we saw their mama's car pull into our driveway. Bill and I ran outside in our robes to the delighed squeals and shouts of "Nana! PawPaw!" and Charlie screamimg, "Hi Nanny!" He refuses ot call me Nana anymore. He is distinguishing "nanas are yellow and yummy" I am Nanny now for him.

The joy those little faces and voices brought us was immense. There parents were taking them to view holiday lights and dropped by to surprise us. I ran back inside to get cookies for them. They were in their jammies, each with his own blanket and bag of snacks. We so wanted to hug each one, but made do with rubbing their hair and telling them how much we loved them. 

As they waved good-bye, we turned to go inside, then I turned around and darted after the car in my robe. I raced their car up the driveway and out to the street, to the sounds of their hysterical laughter.

It truly is the little things in life that matter. 

That's WRITE!

When this change of (my) life occurs, I "fall back" unwillingly, unproductive, and out of sorts. But after a while I get used to the cat meowing in my face at 4:30 instead of 5:30. I accept Daylight Savings Time. 

What actually IS: I fall into deep restorative sleep on the couch from 7 or 8-10:00 p.m. I watch the late NEWS and then have insomnia until 2:00 a.m. This is time I could be putting to good use, as in doing chores or writing, but I'd rather stay cozy under covers, complain,  and wish for what was.  

I procrastinate big time. I am so bad I don't even get on the computer. I access my blog, emails and Facebook through my cell phone. Unfortunately my phone does not allow me to respond. I tell myself I'll to do it later. 

Later happens about 6:00 p.m. when it's pitch dark and I'm quite certain it is almost late NEWS time. But it isn't!

I "ugh" and "oh no" for an entire month. My submissions calendar has so much white space you'd swear it snowed on my desk. Yes, I use a real wall calendar, ready at a glace.

By Decemeber I'm in my new groove. Wish me luck. I've turned the page. So far I am on a roll and picking up speed. I have submitted three pieces and am feeling the urge to write. I think I'll give in to my whim.

Check out publishing opportunities here

https://thewritelife.com/personal-essay/

A flower from heaven

In late summer and through fall, these flowers (sedum) are pale pinkish purple and attract insects.

Since last week the flowers wilted and shriveled on the stems.

On November 19th, a day or two before the 20th anniversary of my friend Rose's death, I discovered this growing right up out of the center of the plant. Not so unusual you say? 

Read on.

Before my best friend Rose died of lung cancer, we made a pact that if there was an afterlife she would send me a flower in winter. I have received an unexpected blossom/flower, different varieties and colors ever since the first anniversary.  

I wrote a story, titled The Golden Girls, which was published in Chicken Soup for the Gardener's Soul about the very first flower I received. 

 I am never surprised, forever grateful, and always in awe. No we havent had a hard freeze, but we are on the cusp, so I can't declare it to be winter, but definitely the growing season is finished for these flowers. 

Another year without my friend, another gift from her from beyond.

 

Sit down and drink up... INTRODUCING

Melissa Face, author of  I Love You More Than Coffee, an essay collection for parents who love coffee a lot and their kids… a little more. 

Her essays and articles have appeared in Richmond Family Magazine, ScaryMommy, and twenty-one volumes of Chicken Soup for the Soul. Read more at melissaface.com

   Book Description: 

Are you trying to balance raising a family with maintaining your own identity?

Have you ever been so exhausted that you showed up to a meeting carrying your baby’s diaper bag instead of your briefcase?

In her debut collection, I Love You More Than Coffee, Melissa Face writes about the emotions we all experience as parents: anticipation, joy, fear, guilt, and worry. Whether you are a new or seasoned parent, you will find common ground in Melissa’s heartfelt, humorous, and authentic stories of her life with two young children.

If you love coffee a lot and your kids (a little) more, this book is for you. Fill your mug with your favorite brew and settle in with I Love You More Than Coffee.

Melissa Face, Author of I Love You More Than Coffee (Mascot Books, September 2020)
Facebook & Instagram - @MelissaFaceWrites melissaface.com

Linda:  Melissa, tell us about some of your roles in life, but first, we have to know how you came up with such an interesting book title! How did you come up with the name of your collection?

Melissa: Okay, the title actually came from my daughter, Delaney. She was three at the time, and she was questioning me about where she ranked in my life. She asked me if I liked her more than candy and cookies. Then, she looked at me very seriously and asked me if I liked her more than coffee. I pretended to be unsure, and then we both laughed. I knew at that moment that she had given me an idea for an essay, as well as the perfect way to package my collection. 

 Linda: Can you tell us a little about your life outside of writing?

 Melissa: Sure! I am mom to Evan (9) and Delaney (6) and wife to Craig, but I won’t say his age. Haha! And I’m a coffee lover.

 I am also an English instructor at the Appomattox Regional Governor’s School for the Arts and Technology in Petersburg, VA. I have the privilege of teaching and working with artists every day, and it’s amazing. Of course right now, I am only with them virtually, but I am hopeful that this won’t be the case for too long. 

 Linda: That is a lot to juggle. When do you write, and where does your inspiration come from?

 Melissa: My kids are definitely my main source of inspiration. They are always saying and doing funny things, and my writing is a way to process whatever is happening in my life. It’s also a way for me to celebrate the hilarity of motherhood, which I try to do on a regular basis. If you can pause and take a deep breath between the arguments, spills, and chaos, raising kids is freaking hilarious!

I write a lot in the summer. I’ve been on a few writing retreats that were very productive, but I am also able to get a lot done at night and on the weekends. I try not to let it interrupt my family time, but sometimes an idea hits and I fear it will lose some of its magic if I don’t work on it right then.

 Linda: How does I Love You More Than Coffee differ from other parenting collections?

 Melissa: For starters, it’s not preachy, but there is still a takeaway and something uplifting with each essay. The most unique feature, however, is that the essays are written in real time, beginning with the moment when I discovered I was pregnant with my first child. The reader gets a real picture of my life and parenting mindset at that point in time. What’s funny about that is there is an obvious change in the tone of the essays from extremely optimistic to a little more realistic. But even the essays at the end are still hopeful, and that reflects my view on parenting and life in general. I’m always hopeful about a new day and another opportunity to be an even better mom.

 Linda: Tell us some facts about you or your writing life that you’ve never shared with readers before.

 Melissa: Ooh! This is a fun one!

1. You probably won’t find this too surprising, but I can drink coffee all day. I do sometimes switch between hot and iced and lattes and cappuccinos! 
2. I still write all of my drafts by hand. This includes essays, my freelance work, and my responses to these questions! It doesn’t feel right if I start typing first.
3. I love running 5k races with my family. My daughter ran her first mile at age 3, and she has since run three 5k events. She’s only 6! Races are so much fun, and we love all the positive energy and the freebies. I have an essay about one of our races in my collection.
4. This is a weird one, but I definitely haven’t shared it with readers. On my first cruise, I hopped up from the dinner table after just meeting our tablemates. (I didn’t realize before the cruise that they would pair us with other people.) The swaying of the ship was getting to me, and I knew I was going to get sick. That couple must have thought I was the rudest person in the world because I jumped up without explaining myself and never returned. 

 Linda: Who would you say is your book’s target audience? 

 Melissa: To be broad, my readers are parents and grandparents. I know as many men who have read my collection as women. It is definitely appreciated from a dad’s point of view, as well as a mom’s. I’m also marketing it as a gift book. It’s perfect for a holiday or birthday gift, in addition to a baby shower present or a gift for a new mother.

 Linda: What are some ways readers can get in touch with you and read more of your work?

 Melissa: Definitely check out my website at www.melissaface.com. I post a monthly coffee chat there where I interview moms and other authors about coffee, motherhood, and writing life. Readers can also find me on Facebook @MelissaFaceWrites or Instagram @melissafacewrites. And to purchase a copy of I Love You More Than Coffee, simply visit one of your favorite retailers including: indiebound.org and Amazon, Target, or Barnes & Noble.

 Linda: What a gift for expectant moms and dads, parents and grandparents, too. 

I Love You More Than Coffee is SURE TO MAKE YOU SMILE or laugh out loud.